Signs of God's Voice
in Your Life
by
Philip Kramer
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Did you ever ask yourself the question, "How does a flower of tree
know when to blossom?" Not every seed becomes a flower, nor does a tree
bloom in the
same way every year. The conditions need to be right and the
plants need to be
receptive of the conditions.
How do I hear God's voice or know God's action in my life? The in a word is
discernment. We could get very heady and try to analyze that word or think
of
synonyms to help us get a better understanding of it. From my
experience, that doesn't work too well because I see discernment as
heart work and not head work.
Let me illustrate by sharing a couple of
experiences in my own life.
20 some years ago, I was sitting in a hospital room with another
Mariannhill Brother as he was preparing for exploratory surgery on a
brain tumor.
That tumor was discovered after we had made a lot of plans
to begin a program for
setting up a breeding farm so we may be able to
sell the Exotic Birds so we may
have enough money for the low income
families in Zaire Africa. This brother was
a very integral part of those
plans.
My problem was what to say about the present and the future, given the
above scenario. The night before his surgery, we opened the Scriptures
and
shared a passage from St. Matthew's Gospel: "Would one of you hand his
son a
stone when he asks for a loaf, or a poisonous snake when he asks for
a fish?"
(Matthew 7:9-10).
I can remember that night as clearly as if it were yesterday, and I can
remember how puzzled I was by those words, since the results came back
that there
was an inoperable cancer with a 50/50 chance of survival. I
saw the plans for our
breeding farm go down the drain.
Where was the will of God? It was not very clear. It boiled down to a day
at a time, believing the those words of Scripture would guide us, but not
knowing
how or for how long. As someone said, "It's like stepping off the
mountain and
believing in one of two things either someone's going to
catch you or you'll
learn how to fly."
The Breeding farm went on for 15 years. The brother with the brain tumor
was involved all those years. Over 3,000 exotic birds was raised in that
time and
brought in over half a million dollars. The Scripture passage
proved to be
prophetic.
Four years ago, I spent 30 days at a desert retreat house outside Tucson,
Arizona. I was searching for direction in my life. It was summertime and
one of
the hottest summers on record for that part of the country. Nobody
went to this
retreat in the summertime. I was completely alone. I was in
an environment that
seemed very hostile, both physically and personally.
As I walked through the
desert, I encountered wild javalina, rattlesnakes,
and coyotes, not to mention
jack rabbits and birds of prey. During those
days I read, walked (at least 10 miles a day), and searched my soul for
a direction.
Scripture was a regular companion on the journey through the desert. It
seemed appropriate, since Jesus spent forty days in the desert, probably
on a
similar journey. Not much stood out for me from the Sacred Text. It
was about the
25th day and the words were about Mary Magdalene in the
cemetery encountering
Jesus after the Resurrection (John 20:11-18). I
shared with my spiritual director
that this text was significant, but I
felt none of the consolation that Mary
expressed in that encounter.
Jesus and God seemed very distant. The director
urged me to spend the
next day with the passage from John 21:16-20. Jesus
encounters Peter
with the question, asked three times, "Do you love Me?"
The question made me very angry because I felt I would not be out there
in
the desert if I didn't have an affirmative response. John concludes
that little
encounter with these words to Jesus: "I tell you solemnly,
as a young man you
fastened your belt and went about as you pleased; but
when you are older you will
stretch out your hands, and another will tie
you fast and carry you off against
your will." Gulp!! So that's the
direction! It certainly wasn't what I was looking for, but it was very
clear that it was the direction. Along with the
direction came the clear
insight that I was also free to choose.
As for the tree or flower, the conditions need to be right and the plant
needs to be receptive. The conditions need to be right, but not
necessarily to
our liking. To be truly receptive, we need the freedom
to accept or reject.
The rest is one day at a time.
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